19-year-old exposes chronic liar to friend group when he ranks her the "dumbest" despite her grades being better: "His red flags have been there all along"

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
May 4, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

Everyone has a friend or family member that likes to embellish a little when they tell a story. For me, it's my dad. He's definitely no liar, and honestly, maybe he genuinely doesn't recall the details of many of his stories, but when he's in doubt, he always goes for the bigger, more dramatic number. My mom says that she's been hearing him tell the tale of the time we were stuck overnight at an airport due to a snowstorm a million times, and with each retelling, our wait gets longer and longer. We were only really stuck for about 10 hours, but if you'd ask him now, we were there for a full day!

In our story today, our protagonist has a friend whose embellishments are not just little lies or misrememberances to enhance a story; they are straight up lies. She keeps her mouth shut about it most of the time, but when he starts to put her down with lies to make himself seem better by comparison, she finally calls him out in front of everyone. 

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  • 01

    AITA for telling my friend I know I'm smarter than him academically after he ranked me the "dumbest" in our friend group?

    Cheezburger Image 10501437952
    via Narith's Images

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    So I (19F) have a friend (also 19M) who lies... a lot. Like, I'm not even exaggerating-he lies about random stuff constantly and forgets what he even said. He's told people we've been friends for years longer than we actually have (which makes no sense
    via u/CryptographerAlive
  • 03
    because they can just ask me), said he lived in a three-story house when he was in a double-wide, and even made up how much money he has. His lies are almost always easy to fact-check, and honestly, I've never judged him for any of that—I was raised not to care about superficial stuff like that.
    via u/CryptographerAlive
  • 04
    But one thing that's always been weird is that he loves to act like he's better than everyone, especially when it comes to academics. In high school, he claimed to be on honor roll all four years, never failed a class, had a 4.0 GPA, etc. But I saw him taking credit recovery senior year, and one of my friends saw his grades on a teacher's computer-and they were bad. Like, really bad.
    via u/CryptographerAlive
  • 05
    Cheezburger Image 10501438464
    via PeopleImages.com - YuriArcurs

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  • 06
    I still never brought it up. I didn't judge him, because we all struggle sometimes. In fact, I opened up to him once and told him I technically failed Spanish, but my teacher passed me in the end. He started making fun of me and calling me names, which I didn't take personally because I know that's just projection.
    via u/CryptographerAlive
  • 07
    Pass Fail
    via boaona

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  • 08
    Anyway, fast forward to a recent trip to Walmart with our friend group, and somehow we start talking about academics. He decides to rank everyone from "smartest to dumbest"-and puts me last. That really
    via u/CryptographerAlive
  • 09
    annoyed me because I knew for a fact that he was failing and lying, and I'd never corrected him before. So I finally said, "I know I'm smarter than you academically, I've just never cared to correct you on it."
    via u/CryptographerAlive
  • 10
    He got really upset and hasn't spoken to me since. Some of my friends said I was being mean, but others think he had it coming. So... AITA for finally saying something after letting him lie for so long?
    via u/CryptographerAlive

  • She's let the lies go on long enough! There's no excuse for the lies he has told, but he should have known better than to throw the girl who has kept her mouth shut under the bus. 

  • 11
    NTA. Dry_Response4914 He sound immature and insecure.
    via u/Dry_Response4914
  • 12
    I disagree with you, though, I think he makes up all that stuff to make everyone think he's awesome and whatever. Ranking friends, especially to their faces, is a mean, toxic, shallow thing to do. I've been friends with people who did that and when I got older and looked back, I knew I should have gotten away from those people.
    via u/Dry_Response4914
  • 13
    So, if he thought it was ok to rank everyone and inevitably putting someone last, why is he throwing a fit over it being done to him? Seems like he got a taste of his own medicine, and whoever from the friend group that says it was mean is a hypocrite.
    via u/Dry_Response4914
  • 14
    Willlow_Blossoms Exactly this. OP let him live in his little fantasy land rent-free and the moment she handed him a mirror, he couldn't handle the reflection. If he can dish out public rankings like it's a game show, he shouldn't be shocked when someone finally calls his bluff.
    via u/Willlow_Blossoms
  • 15
    DigitalStefan People who openly brag about their own intelligence, achievements, wealth, spirituality, charm or other enviable personal quality generally are found lacking when pressed.
    via u/DigitalStefan
  • 16
    NTA DragonCelica • 18h He doesn't sound like the kind of "friend" I'd want in my life.
    via u/DragonCelica
  • 17
    Your friend is incredibly insecure, and he's trying to hide it behind false bravado. His insecurities don't make his actions acceptable. He doesn't get to make himself feel big by putting you down. He also needs to be called on his lying, because it's going to really bite him in the a the older he gets.
    via u/DragonCelica

  • This young man is no friend, and he has made that perfectly clear. It's time for a friendship break up. 

  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10501438720
    via AntonioGuillem

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  • 19
    Homologous_Trend NTA. But lying constantly is not a minor or superficial flaw. It is usually a very, very bad sign.
    via u/Homologous_Trend
  • 20
    ShadowsObserver 15h • Seriously. OP said "I was raised not to care about superficial stuff like that," and my brain immediately responded "superficial stuff like him being completely untrustworthy?"
    via u/ShadowsObserver
  • 21
    Tall-Payment-8015 His red flags have been there all along. Not caring about how much money people have or what type of house they live in is a great trait, but you have to pay attention to the fact that someone needs to lie about it. The problem is that he is a pathological liar not that he struggled with academics or lives in a double wide. None of that matters.
    via u/Tall-Payment-8015
  • 22
    This is not going to improve and you have to think through whether or not it's worth it to continue this friendship. It will never be a real friendship until he works through his issues because he is incapable of giving that to someone.
    via u/Tall-Payment-8015
  • 23
    I would cut my losses and move on. I know that's hard. You are young and it's really good to learn to pay attention to these red flags now. It will save you a lot of heartache as you go through life.
    via u/Tall-Payment-8015
  • 24
    Druid-Flowers1 Nta, you're lucky, you don't need "friends" that try. to look better by putting you down.
    via u/Druid-Flowers1

Tags

friendship liar university AITAH toxic adulting lies smart friends relationships adulthood entitled education breakup red flag Reddit college entitled people
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